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Another E-mail Response I Received About Suicide

I received this e-mail on March 23, 2004 and have permission from the author to share it with everyone:

Dear Sam,

I'm not sure if you're still taking emails. I just happened across this site, and all i can say is WOW. I have to say that i understand completely what has been said alot about spiritual growth.

I also must agree that suicide will have to be dealt with in one life or another. I came to this conclusion a few years back. I will not get into all the details of my life, but i will tell you i am only 30 years old, and if you knew my life, you would wonder how so much pain could be put on one soul. I realize now that I must have commited suicide in previous lifetimes. I believe maybe even more than one. i have experienced alot that would make a person wish to take their own life. But each time i reached out to the hand given ( spiritually) and whoever" it was helped me stand again. i have climbed my way out of the grave many a times, and after a long time of spiritual study, meditation, and growth i know that my main objective in this life is just to make it through. And not to just make it through, but to try and make it the best i can.

I seem to have passed the test with my emotions, and mental areas, but now i face the final one i believe. Over the past couple of years i have been failing physically. My body seems to be giving out on me. The doctors are still trying to figure it all out, but i don't despair. I have two kids, a husband, and many other family and friends that i love, and would hate to leave behind. but i face my future with peace. because i know it is mine to face. i no longer ask "why me". i get up every day and face my problems, no matter how great or small.

A person who commits suicide is not a bad person. And i do not believe that they are looked on as such. But they as you said will have to overcome whatever it was that they gave up on. Being that i have been there, i know, i was strong too, and a good person. I didn't ask for, or do anything to deserve the life i was given. But only with the determination that can only come from failures before can you find the strength to see it through. More than a physical strength, a spiritual strength is needed. To succeed spiritually is more than the life you make, but more what you make out of the life given to you. Only when a person can truely see the big picture, and understand just who they are as a spirit and why they are here, can they find the will to see it through.

I feel for the person who asked you about this, and i feel for their sorrow, and for those who could not see the light to help them through. i've learned -- never say never -- in my life, so i will not say that i will never give up. But i hope that in those weak hours of spirit that i find my strength and companion to help me stand again. i've come to far this time to give up now.

anyways, i have so much i would like to say, because i've never found another site that spoke or see things as i do. i hope that this email lets you know that there is someone who does understand what you say and agrees with it, out of their own personal experience.